canned commitments

with so many relationships around me ending, beginning, fading, and glowing, I just have been thinking and observing a lot... which leads me to questions. what's really getting me is how similar people "should" be to their significant other. One of my friends said that her new boyfriend and here are practically the same person, and that's new for her. Previously, she couldn't imagine that being desirable or functional at all, but it's perfect for her now. Is there some sort of base line, a "our life goals are the same" that needs to be established in order for a relationship to be a positive, worthwhile, long lasting experience? Can i be totally opposite from someone else and be in love with them? Is that a matter of personal preference? If you opperate the same way, is that little bit of fear about how the other will react gone? Do you just spend time getting acquainted and comfortable with one another? Is learned love like that more or less intense and worthwhile than wild (meaning occuring naturally) world.

okay this was going to be long and thoughtful, but i'm too tired.

goodnight. for now.