Alright, so...

Here I am, at 1:46 am on the last day of classes. in 13 hours, I'll be done with my first semester of college (classes, i mean. i still 3 days of finals). To me, that is a really surprising statement. I don't feel as if I've been here for 15 weeks. At the same time, it feels like its been both 2 weeks and forever.

I've come to know so many new names, had some truly unique experiences, learned some valuable lessons outside of the classroom, and expanded academically and musically. I've been challenged socially, ethically, and personally. I made some mistakes, got far too little sleep, found a community, and questioned my purpose in everything I do. I learned about "silly space", changed my shoulder rest, cried in both of my lessons, turned in something I was ashamed of, and received a good grade. I played mariachi music for string orchestra, participated in japanese dance, researched presidential candidates, memorized key signatures, had "two cookie days", played raquetball by my own rules, and never studied more than 5 minutes for a french test.

I'm thinking back to the day that I took all my syllabi and put all the important dates and assignments into my calendar. I was so sure that I wasn't going to make it. Everything was so overwhelming, and I kind of floundered for a while. I knew I was, and I was okay with it. I'm still okay with it. Now though, looking to second semester and jterm, I'm really excited. I'm still scared, but I am looking forward to coming back with a sense of stability and sense of direction.

Thinking about all that's happened in the last 15 weeks is overwhelming in a really positive way.